This child. She is the light that gets Manny up in the morning. She manages to twist Augie’s arm. Sam saves all his genuine smiles for her. She is starting to take up most of the bed. Ann-Kathrin took this photo of her this summer.
I have three kids in three different buildings for school, thanks to a reconfiguration and the continued loss of a public preK for Manny to attend. The middle boys are almost five and almost six. We have had some heartbreaking conversations in the last few weeks… Kindergarten as experienced by my brown boy has been vastly different than Kindergarten experienced by my white one. I stay in my head a lot of the time, which occasionally makes conversations with the unsuspecting public a little awkward. I am happy most of the time– even when I am unbelievably sad.
Our computer and my camera and perhaps my stubborn will all died or became ill a few months ago. I held loosely to this summer. I can remember parts of it, but there are certain weeks in July that are VERY blurry. The boys had four weeks of swimming lessons in August thanks to my mother-in-law. Sam will remember walking to the pool on his own every afternoon: learning to do the front stroke and diving in arms first. I’m not going anywhere. I refuse to change my blog header. I can’t be bothered to search optimize these words or link them into oblivion. I have the luxury of laziness, here. It is what I make it. And I know that I haven’t been making it at all.
But! OH! I am sewing because T AND I ARE NO LONGER NURSING and I have reclaimed huge parts of my life. We met some wonderful people this summer and some of my friends have come out with wonderful books and beautiful things to look at or buy. I’m excited. It’s October. I’ll start small. I’ll stick around.